The blessing of having a significant other to share your daily life is easy to take for granted after a while spent together. Staying classy for your spouse can be the key element for keeping things sparkly.
-Of course, this goes both ways. Making the effort to keep the flame alive in a relationship is a task that falls to both the man and the woman.-
Here are my 5 tips on how to proceed:
1. Take into account when he says what he likes you to wear. If we spend our days in heels, tight in a work uniform, running errands, taking care of kids, cleaning the house... we want to be and feel comfortable in our own home. But do we want to kill our love life? Certainly not. Therefore, we will find the right balance between comfortable and classy. If your spouse tells you that something isn't flattering you, get rid of it. If he mentions that he likes how you look in a certain garment, take it into account. You dress for yourself but when you are in a committed relationship, you also dress for your loved one.
2. Be confident (stop asking him if he finds you pretty. You are). Confidence is extremely attractive to men, and undermining yourself with negative statements such as "I am fat", "I look ugly", "I look so tired" will not help your
cause and can exasperate your spouse (because, of course, he might have to lie). Focus on what you like about yourself, if it is your lips, wear a nice lipstick, if you have beautiful hair, make your look around it, if you have a nice waist, wear something that will accentuate it, ... Now, if you really must do something about your appearance, then do something but never overshare about it. Show confidence.
3. Manage to have your “me time” everyday for these three: hair, nails, skin. As I said earlier, we might spend our days doing many things from going to work to taking care of home chores. The trap is when we let all these schedules blocking us from taking care of ourselves and our appearance. Excellent grooming is essential for elegance.
Schedule your "me time", really, just set a moment in your day so you can have an hour or so. For your hair, decide of a few hairstyles you can choose from every mornings, styles you know you can easily do, that look put together and nice.
For your nails, make sure they are neat and clean. If you have the time and the means to regularly go to a salon, it is perfect but if you don't, make sure you file your nails properly and never keep a chipped nail polish on (ewwww).
And for your skin, even if you do not put make up on, clean and moisturize your face. Drink enough water, have some sleep and remove your make-up before going to bed. The goal is a healthy skin!
4. Invest in nice lingerie and loungewear to stay home (a nice casual maxi dress can work as a stay-home outfit for example). Get rid of your Disney panties, misshapen old shirts and pants and show a little more consideration
for your spouse. There are so many brands to choose from for everyday underwear, nightwear and special occasions!
As for loungewear, combining comfort, functionality and elegance can be achieved with fit and flare midi dresses, casual maxi dresses, shirt dresses or monochromatic sets (loungewear or set of nightgown + its kimono) and cardigans.
Select good quality garments, my favourite material is cashmere but cotton, silk and wool work well. Avoid synthetic materials as they tend to look cheap and don't look nice after a few washes. Mixes of materials work (for example a blend of 20% polyester and 80% wool) but really pay attention to the look of it, if it looks too tacky, don't go for it. The price might be interesting but you will look cheap and the garment won't last long.
5. Practice good manners within closed doors just as you would outside your house with strangers. Having good manners is having consideration for others so why not have consideration for your spouse? Of course, we get comfortable around the one with whom we share everything but don't forget to treat him with respect, it will only inspire the same respect in return. Chew with your mouth closed, say "please" and "thank you".
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