What first impression do you give?
- Nadia
- Jan 26, 2016
- 4 min read
I do believe in inner beauty and think that it is the most important. I can also add that, no matter how beautiful you are outside, if you have a poor inner beauty, you won't be as beautiful as you could be.
Yet, I think working on the outside is as important as working in the inside.
Why?
Simply because we are all human beings, and despite the common thoughts "do not judge a book by its cover", "inner beauty is what matter" etc...
Our eye will get an idea of who the person is in few seconds.
This type of scenario happened to me so many times: you finally get to have a real conversation with this neighbor you always see leaving his house in the afternoon and coming back late night, his arms are covered with tattoos and he doesn't seem to be friendly at all. You thought he had no job and was probably meeting some friends in bars everyday.
Then you discover that he is a doctor who is sent for emergencies to people's homes and who loves pets so much that he actually just adopted 3 puppies. You didn't want to judge, but your brain just did.
Now that you are aware of that phenomenon, look at you in the mirror and ask yourself "When people look at me for the first time, what do they see?" then,"What do I want them to see?".
I am underlining "I want" to make it clear that we are not here to be like what others want us to be but to just... be.
The best advice I have ever received is this one: In any situation, always go for the truth.
Well, we will definitely apply this in the art of giving a first impression.
Make sure you are not pretending to be someone else, be yourself.
I know it sounds cliché to say that but you do not want to end up trying so hard that every part of you (your words, your thoughts, your style) are fake, as you may be looking for your true self forever.
It is good to have a "role model", someone that inspires you, but be careful not to just "copy".
Be able to listen to yourself: choose a career that you want, have hobbies you like, decorate your home the way you want it, everything about you from the things you say to the clothes you wear should reflect this unique person you are and emphasize all the good within you.
When I was younger, I had a tendency to hide stuff I loved but wasn't seen as "cool" (I played flute in high school and loved it), now I am just proud of everything I do without caring if it is old school, unusual or '"unexpected" and I am happy.
After all, we spend our lives trying to stand out and show people that we are different. Why should we be ashamed of the things that make us unique? But let's go back to the first impression.
If you have to work on that, I strongly recommend that you check
1. Your wardrobe
2. Your general appearance
3. Your posture
1. For your wardrobe, it is very simple, have clothes that flatters you but do not necessarily follow trends. Fashion is not style. Fashion is a style imposed by designers that only last a season and that doesn't fit everybody. Style is your ability to put together clothes on you and will make you walk and feel like this queen/king that you are. Be comfortable, and what I mean by that is, if you wear something and when you look at the mirror you feel like "dressed up", then it is not you. Go change.
2. Be well groomed in all circumstances. Just because I know that this does not happen only to me: going out dressed like a president everyday and this only 10 minutes walk on a Sunday morning you've walked the dog, you've decided to not match any color, wash your hair, not even brush your teeth... you've met this life-changing person who could have been the love of your life or just the potential big client who would have sign a big contract and bring millions to your company. Take care of your hair, your teeth, your nails and all the rest. You do not need to be extra. Just clean and neat. Take care of yourself when you are alone as much as you would do to meet someone. Not only you'll feel good about yourself, but people really appreciate talking to someone who pays attention to his appearance, it's a way of showing respect to others.
3. Stand straight. Do not lift your chin too high up as we do not want to act snob -I just want to mention that snob is not class-. If you have to shake hands, do it firmly and look at people in their eyes when talking.
Apply these few tips and I guarantee that you'll gain confidence and improve your first impression!
Nadia K.
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